Please bear with me

I am on a personal quest to document my story as Emma's mom.  I would like to record our story for the generations or at least for our children as they may ask questions as time goes on.  I have forgotten some details and I would like to give them the best accounting that they care to read.  Why so public?  I wish that I could share this journey and heart ache and happiness and joy.  I hope that if just one person feels that they are not alone on their special needs journey, that is wonderful.  I have found a blog to read of a special needs journey where I can share tears of joy and sorrow.  It is so human to bear one another's burdens and rejoice in their rejoicings and in this world of blogs, even if you don't know them.

Also, if I might enlighten one person about the life of a family with a special needs child.  Do you flinch when somebody flippantly says "retard"?  I do, I didn't use to but I do.  Do you make efforts to interact with children that are different?  Do you encourage your children to play with all children even if they are different?  Do you take the time to explain to your child why "Kyle is different"?

I will frankly say that I am a different person having Emma in my life.  When I was little, I used to think "families with retarded children chose to have these weird kids in their family".  Families with "retarded" children don't generally chose this life, some do and that is beyond a generosity that I can imagine.  In our PC society today, we try to soften the blow of mentally retarded with "delayed" "special needs" or "mentally challenged."  Really what it comes down to is our child's brain is retarded, slow, not up to speed.  We use the word in music:  to slow the tempo.  We use the word in clothing; flame retardant, slow to ignite.  We however don't use the word, it still hurts.  We say that Emma is developmentally delayed.

I wear a size 12 shoe and my shoes are not fabulous by any means but they are big enough that you might try to walk a mile in them and I think it will be a walk like you have never taken.  So I invite you to come walk with me.......